NiteChylde

So yeah.. this has certainly been a fun week to say the least. Notice the dripping sarcasm coming from that? I honestly didn’t think I could feel this low. I honestly passed depressed and went to blank. Monday this week I cut the inside of my lip deeply when I accidentally banged it on my car. It’s still hurting. Tuesday, my roommate was trying to fix the water heater in the outside closet and accidentally broke one of my mom’s lamps. I’m not mad at her, but I did all of a sudden feel very depressed about it. She died when I was 12, so everything I have of hers—in use, useful, or not—I cherish. My low mood killed a majority of what I’d planned to do that day, not to mention my shoot was suddenly cancelled. Wednesday my cat knocked over my vase of dried flowers that I’d had since I moved in to my townhouse, and had been working on for a year to get just right. Almost half the bouquet has been ruined now. Moving on to Thursday, I get news that I’m not where I need to be as far as my guitar, and with the timeframe we’re looking at, I won’t be ready in time; so I’m no longer the guitarist for Paris Oroborus. My afternoon was spent watching the 6th Harry Potter DVD, which I bought on Wednesday to counter feeling depressed: I tend to want to buy things when I’m depressed. And if my week wasn’t already complete... my car gets repossessed last night. Aside from clothes, and my domme bag.. I had my ipod, my prescription, my planner.. and oh yes… my wallet with my ID and Wachovia card. I managed to find out where my car is today, and I paid a service fee so I can go and get my stuff out of it. They’re open on Tuesday and Thursday so I’m going as early as possible to clear my car of everything. This week has me feeling more broken and beaten down than I’ve ever felt before. I have to say though, I do feel lucky that I have people who care enough—or are just that damn stubborn—to be there for me. You all know who you are and I love you for that.

And thank my wifey for the song that’s now stuck in my head.. heh.

Hello my lovelies. So much to write, so much to write. 1st of all, I have to give an update on my Dementia Clothing order. I FINALLY got it; can’t say I’m all that impressed really. It honestly wouldn’t surprise me if Lectra found some stuff lying around that matched what I wanted, and tossed it together and shipped it just to shut me up. I could tell she was a little less than enthused about me, considering the package had no wrapping in it, and no invoice. Kind of like a “Here’s your shit, now stop talking about me.” Ya know what… I think I won’t, just because of that. I endured months of trying to contact this woman, and invested nearly $100 for an outfit I was going to proudly wear to an event that has since looong come and gone… twice. I still stand by my belief that noone should buy Dementia clothing unless you’re in the market to get ripped off. The outfit I finally received, I handed over to my friend Laura, who altered it for me. She added some designs so it wouldn’t be so plain and—how shall I put this—ugly and embarrassingly dull. She also shortened the straps so they wouldn’t be flying everywhere. I swear, I love that girl, and she made that outfit look amazing! I ‘m totally proud to wear it—it hardly looks like the same outfit I was sent, which is a blessing and a half of course. I can’t wait until she gets her clothing line up and running: Iconoclast Clothing. More to come as that develops ^_^ Oh and Dementia... last I checked, her site’s non-existent now. Personally, I don’t think she deserved a site, with all the bad business practices that were going on with her.

Now for something pleasant and AWESOME! This past Sunday was one of the best concerts I’ve been to in a while. The Crystal Method was in town. I’ve loved them for the longest time, at the very least a decade now. I was in the front, dancing and screaming like an idiot when I get approached by this lady who asked me if I was a fan. I nod emphatically and she tells me to wait where I was. She goes off to tell this guy, and he heads off... then comes back with a picture. Just for being an avid fan, I’d won an autographed picture of The Crystal Method!! There are only 3 of those particular pictures: The group has one, the fan club has the 2nd, and I have the 3rd one!!! I was ridiculously excited the entire time. I got to go backstage, had my picture taken with both Ken and Scott, and hung out with them by the bus for a while. The only thing that would have made it even more awesome would have been if I could have gone on the tour-bus ^_^. Overall, it was the most awesome night ever, and a glorious end to an otherwise shitty family-riddled weekend. And I need to go back to Asheville and do some downtown shopping on my own friggin time. It’s not like it’s a far drive after all.

And now for a moment in stupidity: apparently this lady came into the store wanting to return fog lights. My sales associate Tricia was there. She listens to this woman, then tries to keep from laughing. For one thing, she has no receipt. No receipt, no returns, no exceptions. Also, we can only do returns and exchanges on items that have been bought up to 30 days prior to coming in. This woman told Tricia that she bought the lights LAST HALLOWEEN. The last time I checked… we’re closer to this upcoming Halloween than we are to last Halloween. And the final kicker: She bought it online… from the Spirit store. This means, ladies and gentlemen, that she in fact did NOT even GET this stuff from SPENCERS!! Tricia explains to the woman that Spencers is not part of Spirit. Owned by the same overall company, but not the same entity. This assclown of a woman is still confused as to why she can’t return the lights, until Tricia tells her “If there was anything that could be done, which there ISN’T, you would have to take it back to the Spirit store.” Her response was to ask if there was a Spirit store in the mall, to which Tricia tells her no. why? Because it’s NOT HALLOWEEN YET DUMBASS. So this woman—who I have now decided should be a spokesperson for abstinence—says that she’ll wait until they open and take the lights back then. I mean really, is she serious? What kind of world do we live in where people are allowed to roam the streets, this fucktastically retarded? I would love to see her go into the Spirit store when it opens.

It’s been a very long time since I’ve typed anything here. I’ve been all kinds of busy these past few months to be honest, an with everything as crazy as it has been, I haven’t had time to write. I suppose that would mean I have a LOT to put in here... well I promise I won’t make this too incredibly, ridiculously long. Heh, the intro alone is long enough, doncha think? ^_^

A few months ago (April 18th), we saw the end of a great venue: Purgatory. The last one was appropriately named Ragnarok. And it was indeed an event of Viking awesomeness. I had a chainmail top and skirt—well it was scalemail actually, which I personally think was even kewler. Despite a few snags and changes, I put on a very good show if I do say so myself, with fire of all kinds. I wouldn’t mind doing that show again, under different conditions. Overall, much fun.

I’m skipping over a lot if you couldn’t tell. There’s just too much lol. Fast forward quite a bit. I finally grew a pair and got my industrial done ^_^. The lead singer of the band I’m in—Paris Oroborus—did it for me. Kryss knows how to pierce, and it was a relatively painless undertaking. Granted, getting stabbed twice in the ear wasn’t pleasant, but I have a feeling it’s definitely not as bad as it could have been. I have to say, I like it, and it’ll definitely be pretty awesome when I can change out the barbell for one of the ones someone bought me. That’s right, bought for me. This kid came into Spencers and I was working on my body jewelry. I made a comment how I would love to get the 4-pack of industrials one day, and he offers to buy it for me. Just out of the blue! I didn’t believe him, until he took the pack from me and placed it on the counter. And just like that, paid for them along with his stuff. I have no idea who that kid was, but those industrials shall come in handy. Oh yes, they shall.

My weekend was riddled with idiocy I would have to say: I went to a family reunion. I was already irked that I was missing out on some fun stuff in Charlotte; I had to endure all kinds of stupidity, on multiple levels. I was anything but pleased at the prospect of having to room with my aunt, when my cousin and I Clearly already laid claim to one of the two hotel rooms. Seriously, how can a person let someone claim a room... then come back later and tell them they have to move? Needless to say, I put up a resistance. And the next time they came into the room, I was more than ready to tell them that I was NOT moving. At all. Period. My aunt was going to have to literally pick me up if she wanted me to room with her. Overall, I pretty much ate all weekend; it wasn’t like I was allowed to go anywhere and do anything else. My cousin and I were only allowed to a measly hour in downtown Asheville... ONE HOUR! And that got interrupted when we had to go back to my grandmother’s house to check the locks because the neighbor’s granddaughter said the door was open. Result of cutting my happiness short: The door was locked... which I knew... because I locked it my damn self. I looked around and just asked: “Do we know if she saw the door unlocked and opened… while we were THERE?” of course, I get no response. Typical.

This had gotten to be a pretty long post, so I’ll close it here, and make a 2nd post after.

I’d like to take a moment to make a public service announcement for anyone interested in buying cybergear of any kind. Dementia Clothing is one clothing company that is NOT worth your time in the least. While she has some interesting designs, her business practices are far below standard. I am not writing this to flame Lectra Paris or Dementia Clothing; I’m writing this as a warning for people who are considering buying.


I personally have been waiting nearly 6 months now for items that were supposedly shipped 2 and a half weeks ago—so she claimed. Interestingly enough, she never gave me a tracking number, or any form of proof that she mailed my order for that matter; she merely changed my status on her site to “delivered”. Before that, it had been 5 months of receiving no response from her on a $92 order. In order to get a response, I had to threaten to report her to the Better Business Bureau, and gave her a deadline to respond to me, which she did just to buy herself some time. She gave me an excuse of not having enough money for shipping, to which I gave her an additional $10 to cover the cost. That is over $100 invested in an outfit. She has been ignoring my emails on purpose.


I am not the only one. She has not fulfilled orders for many other customers. Patrick Von Fatal of F1lth on Demand for example has been waiting for well over a year with no form of contact from Lectra. I have also heard personally that Jett of Vampire Freaks has also been very much screwed over by Lectra and Dementia Clothing. This is just a very small sample of what I’m sure are hundreds upon hundreds of others. Not only will you not receive your order, but you will not receive a refund either.


To back up my claims further, feel free to look at the Better Business Bureau website for yourself, where you will see she has a rating of F. I’ve included the link here: http://www.bbb.org/connecticut/business-reviews/clothing-retail/dementia-clothing-in-new-haven-ct-87057539 She has already been reported 3 times, and I filed my report prior to typing this announcement. That’s 4 reports against Dementia Clothing.


I don’t know about anyone else, but had I known about this before, I would have not wasted my money on Dementia Clothing. I hope that others aren’t duped into losing valuable time and money; and to those who have: I hope you speak up as well.

Hello Kids! It’s time for another series of rants from yours truly. I don’t thin I have too much in the way of negative things this go round, so I’ll entertain with tales of Fun, Furs, and FREEZING Fucking Temperatures. 1st let’s backtrack a weekend to FWA. OMG I had sooooo much fun! I was on staff again this year and my adventure started when I found out there was no jersey for me. Apparently the company messed up my jersey twice… and TigerPaw was all angry-fur with them on my behalf. I was so honored ^_^ I was given someone else’s jersey who didn’t show up to the con, and I went to Hancock Fabrics to get lettering to cover what was on the jersey. I didn’t mind, even though since I never had time to sew everything on, I ghetto-rigged it with safety pins. I got to play with servals—biiiig kitties. That was definitely fun, even when one of them stepped squah on my bladder and looked at me wanting his head scratched…heh. I reaffirm that Archangel is made of magic: he gives KILLER massages. There was actually a lot that happened that weekend, it’s hard to make sure I put everything down. The Staff dinner was very awesome, and I must say, we were the kewlest looking gang ever with our jerseys ^_^ My table was perhaps the most awesome, I must say, because we had my best friend Mata, Greyson, Kodie, Recca, Fuego, Crenn and Hino. Kudos to Recca for doing the “C-Walk” in the Hard Rock Café in Atlanta and NOT getting us all shot at. Lol. Also, I don’t think I can ever look at Greyson the same… He Knows The Secret to Macaroni And Cheese Casserole!! We had fun singing “Love Shack”, and seeing the employees dancing because of us—yes, we are made of awesome. As I’m sure you’ve all noticed, I’m breezing through a good bit of my wonderful trip. This is what happens when I have soo much I could type about, but am too damn tired to mentally process it all.

Now we move to this most recent weekend. After working at AEBN and Spencers, I danced at an Industrial event—Hazmat—until around 2ish. I drove home, packed, and headed to the airport to catch a 6:30 am flight to Jersey. I was up there recording and practicing with Paris Oroborus, a very very awesome band. I’m the new guitarist, and occasional female vocals. We did some vocals, and I nearly peed myself when our fearless leader Kryss said he was interested in song lyrics I’d written. He picked out 2, and they could potentially be on the next album, provided they come out sounding like whoah. I have total faith in Kryss, so I know whatever he does, it’ll be amazing. We might be playing at a festival in June, and I’m totally psyched about that too. ^_^ Saturday night, they had Earth Hour—and NYC cut off the major lights for one hour: Times square, the Chrysler building, empire state building… all dark. We did part of our band photoshoot out there; with the desolate cityscape in the background. I personally thought all the photoshoot pics came out amazingly.

So Now I’m getting myself geared up for a LOT of things: Paris Oroborus practices and rehearsals, Fan dancing for the fire troupe I belong to, and this upcoming Purgatory—the LAST ONE—this upcoming April.. the 18th.

And on an additional note… Ikea is a sensory overload. Don’t believe me? Go to one and try to keep focused. I DARE ya.

For one thing, I’m surprised I even remembered the password to get to my journal site(s). I’ve been up to quite a lot since the last time I haunted this place. New fun-ness, new idiocy, and new reasons to want to drown myself in the nearest body of water. Hm, where to start. Purgatory shows have come and gone, and I have to admit, it’s been a crazy ride to say the least. The shows I’ve done so far have been beyond amazing and I have to thank the audience for appreciating my love for entertaining, and of course my invaluable fellow performers. So many people to give a shout out to; Danny for being a great co-star, Juggernaut for being a great sport during the New Years show, Abby and Scott for making for one hell of a performance during St Valentine’s Day, and of course, Tig, for coming up with some of the most impressive ideas ever to grace the stage. I couldn’t have done it without you guys, so big props and hugs to you all ^_^ And now, we’re all gearing up for an all out Viking Extravaganza: Purgatory—RAGNAROK! So everyone grab your horned helmets and battle axes; Purgatory is going out in a blaze of Glory!!
What else… I’ve been asked to be in an Industrial band: Paris Oroborus, playing guitar and doing occasional vocals. I’m pretty stoked about that too! It’s given me the motivation to practice my fingers off. I’m a pretty determined thing, so I know I’ll be good enough in no time; afterall, I taught myself bass and keyboard and I have enough musical experience/training that I can handle it. Aside from playing guitar in a band, I’ve got more avenues open finally to work on my own music project HOORAY!
I’m also trying to get more modeling done, as well as get some photography of my own. I swear I’m too multi-talented sometimes. I guess it’s because I like to do as much as I can while I’m still able to move around without the aid of a cane, heh. Dancer, singer, musician, model, actor (yes, there’s a difference, and it’s not about gender), photographer…a regular jack of all trades if you will. Maybe I’ll find one of those avenues of entertainment and settle into it, but for now I like having this much to occupy my mind. It keeps me constantly thinking.
And now, for a bit of “wow”, as I’m sure all of you are more used to—that is, when I used to write more regularly, heh. I promise I’ll work on that. I had an AWESOME idea—well it was more than likely Tig’s idea—for an effect for St Valentine’s Day: shotglasses; one to smash across Phoenix’s head, and one to smash in Nexus’ mouth during my show. The shotglasses were going to be made out of candy glass. It’s actually pretty easy to make, though it takes a lil while: sugar, syrup, water. Boil to 300 degrees, pour into mold. Bam, candy glass. Well the 1st shot produced 1 good shotglass, but we were a little iffy on how to work them out of the molds after that, because it started hardening pretty quickly. No worries. I had another idea for molding. Well I did it the 2nd night myself.. and yeaaah. I learned something important. I am just not that quick. I also learned that 300 degrees of molten sandy doesn’t feel too pleasant on the hands. 1st and 2nd degree burns. I had 4 bandaids on my left hand. Although, in retrospect, it would have been pretty funny to watch me running to the bathroom, arms flailing madly as I made a crack-head dash to the bathroom to shove my hands under cold water, then peel hardened candy off my fingers. Here’s some dedication for ya though: after I decided “fuck it”, I played Fable 2… with a large pot of cold water to shove my hand in whenever it started to sting.
And now, Brave moments in Ghetto History. Tale 1. I’m in Spencers when this big dood comes walking in wearing a shirt I can only describe as highlighter-you’re-going-to-hell-green, with a white hat. He walks up to me—I shit you not—and begins his riveting conversation with a “Ey Gurl”. I turn my head to see what this missing link wants, and then he asks the question of the night: “What’s the blackest thing y’all got in here?” Ok, I’m a little.. ok a lot rusty on my ghetto-speak, so I raise an eyebrow with a confused look and go “um… wha?” So he repeats the question. My response is to point to the shotglasses I was standing next to at the time: “Um, these are black.. and we have t-shirts…hoodies.. blacklights?” He then clarifies for me my telling me it doesn’t have to have Obama on it, but some words or something.. so what’s the blackest thing we have.. I half shake my head as if trying to understand someone speaking Pikey to me and fineally just say “Um.. I’m suburban, so I have no idea what you’re talking about.” And then I turn and walk off. Here’s a hint: USE YOUR MOUTH WORDS. I can understand the following: English, American (oh yes, they’re different!), and Spanish. Notice how Ebonics and Ghetto are nowhere in there. And let’s not forget the very special guy that I encountered a few days ago. I’m walking from the grocery store to my boyfriend’s apartment when this guy drives up..and Stops his car. He rolls down the window leans out and yells “Ey! Ey! Get In!” I kinda look at him like “WTF?” and he tells me to get in again. My response exactly: “um.. yeaaaah-No.” and I roll my eyes and continue my walk and my phone convo with Jax. I swear, some people need a good shooting in the face with a sawed off shotgun.

Alright, this should have been written eons ago but I’ve been busy as all hell with everything else that could possibly happen. Hmm… where to begin. JUNE PURGATORY! Let me say, it was the most fun I’ve had in a while. Granted, I entertained thoughts of killing my cast, but they pulled through and put on one hell of a show. Kudos to everyone who helped make it one of the best and still talked about shows around. For those of you who didn’t get to see the mayhem, I’ll give you a small synopsis of the show:

Little girl goes to a mysterious carnival where she encounters the strong man, and the ringmistress. Everyone in the carnival—including the snow leopard that jumps through a hoop—has a white emotionless mask on, with the exception of the ringmistress herself. She’s shown the bearded lady, the Siamese drag twins, the snow leopard, and the strongman, each performing for her. Suddenly, they all turn on her and do wonderfully horrid things to her (tie her up with bondage tape, rip her clothes off, force feed her, drip candle wax on her, flog her). She’s set on a chair and the ringmistress proceeds to take a meat cleaver and remove the young girl’s pretty face. She replaces it with a white mask, and places the severed face on a display board with the faces of all the other carnival performers. The little girl then takes her place as the newest act for the show.

Yes, everyone loved it and I enjoyed doing it. Let’s see.. what else has everyone missed. Yes, Body Painting with the very talented Pashur. ^_^ That was loads of fun. I’ve worked with him 3 times so far, and I’m looking forward to working with him again soon. Hell, we might become hanging out buddies; he acts like so many people I used to hang out with back in college. I was fortunate enough to get painted as Set, the Egyptian God of Destruction; as Osiris, the Egyptian God of the Underworld; and as a zombie. I even went to the mall into Spencers all Zombie-fied.. freaked out a LOT of people hehe ^_^

We now fast forward to the August Purgatory.. which I unfortunately missed due to ridiculous circumstances beyond my control: namely, I was arrested. Yes, you heard me correctly. Arrested. Apparently—after having to ask 5-7 times why I was being pulled over—I was driving with a suspended license, which should NOT have been since I got that mess cleared up back in February. Someone, somewhere fucked up. So I get taken in and get processed, which they assure me won’t take long. 3 and a half hours and no phonecall later, I’m let go..VERY pissed off. I did get to see and hear some interesting things while in the jailhouse—and no, I didn’t wear one of those orange jumpsuits. One guy actually had the nerve to argue with a cop after he’d been brought in “ Hey man.. I don’t see what the problem is.. I mean.. if I’m shooting at someone, how is that against the law or wrong?” I shit you not. He actually said that. Another guy.. I don’t know what the cops did before he was brought in, but the man pissed himself.. I was embarrassed for him.

That should bring us up to the here and now. I have a LOT on my plate for this month and partially next month. I went to a talent/model audition last weekend after having filled out an app (I was stopped in the mall) and getting a call from one of the agents to attend the audition. I went in and talked with the judging agents who looked at my bone structure and talked to me to get a feel for my personality. After looking at my application and all of the singing, acting, and modeling experience I’ve had (roughly 10 years at least for all three) they asked me the earliest I’d done each. (singing in choral groups since 8th grade, 1st time on TV doing WTVI Kids’ Club when I was around 6, modeling since I was about 16-17) For the 2nd time going up, instead of saying a TV commercial line, they wanted me to sing for them so they could hear my singing voice. Other people decided to sing too: I was surprised this 14yr old girl knew the words to “Weak” by SWV… that song is ooold school. Anyhoos, instead of picking some popular top 40 song, I went a little more classy, and sang “Come Back With that Same Look” from the Andrew Lloyd Weber musical “Song and Dance”. Apparently they loved it, because I made the final cut!! I talked to an agent the next day and read over and discussed a contract. Luckily, I’ve had to read far more complicated contracts at my full time job, and I made sure every little possible thing was explained in detail. I got to look at my audition sheet, and the agents that were there judging wrote down that I’m highly marketable, and can be used for magazine, print, billboard, runway, high fashion, parts modeling, fitness, voice-overs, television commercials, television acting, film, and radio. Being versatile pays off ^_^

Nearing the end of this month, I have a shoot for my professional portfolio (physical and online port) and comp cards on the 20th, and then the very next day I’m going to be doing runway for a hair show, modeling a new style from RUSK. I’m SUPER excited that things are finally starting to come together for me. And to top it all off, I’m working on my show for this upcoming Purgatory. ^_^ Can we say busy busy?

I wouldn’t change a thing though!

Alright, I have a lot of updates on the life and goings-on of yours truly. Sorry things have been so hectic around here lately that U haven’t updated in like, half past forever. Heh. Hmmm…let’s see. We’ll go back to about April, that sounds about right. I managed to fulfill a dream I had once upon a time in the days when I was somewhat girly. I always wanted to be a Bond Girl, and I got to do just that!! I was one of the girls for a promotional event called “RESOUND” where I had on a lacy red latin-inspired dress. There were video cameras, photographers, wining, dining and dancing. All the girls had to come up with names for themselves for this James Bond themed event, and I decided on the name “Tango Meridian” (Because very few men know how to dance along that “fine line”—joking comment courtesy of a friend of mine). It was a lot of fun with quite a bit of networking ^_^ So yes, I managed to do something I was soooo super excited to be a part of and had the best time ever doing it. I even got to get a picture taken with the guy they had playing 007 for the evening. Pics to come at some point I’m sure!

The rest of April involved Purgatory, and 2 photoshoots. They were tons of fun and I give major kudos to Xander for finding such kickass areas to shoot—We HAVE to go back there—and to Ty for a very entertaining shoot. His wife was soo much fun to talk to. I love being able to do shoots with people I feel comfortable with; I swear, I’m going to have to eventually get off my ass to get my website up and running.

May saw the coming of what had to be one of my most engaging shoots ever. I went to New Jersey to do a weekend-long shoot with Hobbleskirt of S+S Photography. He was sooo nice, I swear! The trip itself was interesting, as the flight kept getting postponed. I was wondering if we were ever going to even leave the airport. And it was at the Charlotte Douglass Airport that I thought of something: I really sometimes wish I could temporarily be related to people…just so I could smack their kids in the back of the head and not get yelled at. These two kids were going back and forth for no reason whatsoever. I wanted to bludgeon them both. You’re fighting over who’s touching whose chair? I’ll make it easy for you: KEEP YOUR DAMNED HANDS TO YOURSELF. There we go, problem solved. So fast forward to when I FINALLY get into Jersey and meet Serge—we’re driving to get something to eat when I see the strangest sight in my interstate riding life. Smoke. Black, billowy smoke….and then flames. Very high… flamey flames. I blink and stare. There was a car on fire on the interstate going in the opposite direction we were going. Serge looked at me as I was sitting there with my mouth agape and point and says : what, you’ve never seen that before? I kind of blinked and replied “No, we really don’t have flaming cars on the interstate that much in North Carolina” It was SO weird! It’s like “Hi, welcome to Jersey; here’s your flame-engulfed car for your viewing pleasure.” In retrospect, I would have taken pictures or a video of it. The shoot was more fun than I’d had in a very long time: TONS of outfits, and even a little rope suspension ^_^ I hope I can make it up there and try that again. It was his 1st suspension, and I’m glad I was a part of it ^_^. After the weekend of photo-shooty-goodness, Serge dropped me off at Pet’s house (very dear and close friend of mine). We went for a walk and I got to take pictures of the Empire State Building—he lives right across the river from Manhattan. It was awesome. I can’t wait to go back so I can actually get into New York to see it.

I’m now gearing up for a photographer’s workshop—where I’ll be one of the models—and for the next Purgatory, and I have to say, I’m excited as all hell about this one. I’ve got a lot invested in it, considering I suggested the theme, requested to be on the flyer for it, and will be doing a show. I think anyone and everyone who can make it to Charlotte on the 14th should definitely go! http://singlecell.us to get the info on it all. Much fun and insanity shall ensue!

Well well.. just when you thought yours truly wouldn’t have anything to rant about.. I find something. In fact, I should’ve ranted about this sooner, but I’ve been a touch bit busy lately. I can across—thanks to my supervisor at my full time job—this lovely article: http://katysconservativecorner.typepad.com/katy/2008/02/spencer-gifts-a.html At first, I was going to leave it alone, but then a little voice inside me said that I had to say something, and say something I did. Considering I work for Spencers, and have been for nearly 5 years now, I can safely say I find this article laughable. 1st of all, you cannot sell porn in a mall. That’s what porn stores are for. I will admit, some of our stuff is rather racy, but that goes to show that much of the populous is desensitized to adult humor. Speaking of which, we have this nifty sign at the front of the store, saying that we carry adult humor. There ya go. Nice warning for all the head-up-their-asses fuckoff conservative pricks who are up in arms about what we carry in our store. Also, a bit of enlightenment on our policies: if you are under the age of 18, and/or do not have proper identification stating you are in fact above the age of 18, you will not be sold anything from the Luv Unit. Period. Done Deal. Anything Not in our Luv Unit, if it’s questionable, we do ask “Do your parents know you’re buying this?” and most of the times we require the parents to be present for said item’s purchase. Lighters? Yep, we sell Zippos. Yes, they’ve been sold to kids under 18, but do you know why? Because they have NO FLUID IN THEM! That’s right, you have to buy the fluid separate, and Oh Look! You have to be 18 with valid ID to buy fluid! Now, you tell me where a kid under 18 can buy lighter fluid, and I’ll show you a place run by dumbasses. No, the problem isn’t with Spencers, it’s distributors, or the liberal Home Office. It’s parents. Yes, dumb ass parents who rant and bitch about the items in the store after either a) been caught shopping for “personal massagers” by their kids, b) been caught by one of their friends while hoplding some phallic object, or c) just had kids for the sake of fucking with the population and economy, and instead of taking care of them, give them $50+ dollars and drop them off at the mall. So now the truth comes out. Let’s put it all into perspective. If parents cared more about what their kids were doing, they wouldn't give them the credit card or a wad-and-a-half of cash and drop em off at the mall. They’d be shopping WITH the fucking brats.

I had this woman call the store because she was at another store bitching because her daughter bought a Chucky doll—the talking one—for like $50. She was going on about how it was wrong for us to sell something like that to a 13yr old child (blah blah fucking blah). After she’d finished, I responded with “so.. your kid was in the store, and bought a doll. Nothing adult.. a Doll. And um… WHERE were you Ma’am?” Would you believe that bitch was in another fuckin store?? So she rants a little more and finally I had to tell her: “Sorry, but if you let your kid walk around with that much cash on her, you really should be with her at all times; or at least in the same store. We’re not responsible for what your child buys beyond preventing them from buying adult-related material.. and a doll is not adult-related.” I swear, some people need to be shot in the face for their lack of parenting. Gods know if I ever reproduce a hellspawn, I’m not going to be like “Hey, here’s $100. I’m dropping you off at the mall while I go and pay you no attention because deep down I’m a selfish cunt and don’t want to be around you—or your screaming friends. So here’s a shot at imitation freedom. Good Speed Lil Buddy!” No, I would take interest in what they liked, what they watched, what they wanted to buy. Showing interest in your child isn’t a bad thing, really. It shows you fucking care about what you pushed out of you those many moons ago. And hell, if you don’t want to have an interest in what you r kid does, that’s fine, but pick something more important than the stuff we carry in Spencers to bitch about. Instead of going off that they saw a lollipop shaped like a penis, why don’t you put the same effort into wondering where they’re buying those drugs they’re hiding from you? And sex.. must not forget about the sex. You know why teen pregnancies are up? Because parents keep bitching about what’s in Spencers instead of what’s goin in their daughters.

I know this is late, but hey, better late than never! Besides, I’ve been sooo friggin busy balancing finances and getting photoshoots scheduled that I didn’t have time to sit and write for all of my dedicated journal-readers. Don’t worry, I still love you all; after all, here I am, slaving away at a keyboard, pouring my brain into a series of ones and zeroes, all for the purpose of your viewing pleasure. Well, where to start? Feb 15th-17th. FWA. Furry Weekend Atlanta. WOOOOW! That was one of the most fun cons I’ve been to in my life!! I would like to thank everyone who made it as awesome as it was, especially my partner in crime, and best friend Matafleur. ^_^ So, where to start with this mayhem of epic furriness. We were both on staff this year, which was super awesome. And to think, people kept saying we wouldn’t have fun being on staff. HA! The jerseys were nifty and all, but the experience of being FWA Staff is what made me happiest. When I’d applied and they asked where I would like to be placed, I pretty much checked off everything and included “Wherever you need me at the time” I’m not picky, I just love helping. I’ll have to start editing pics soon too. I have a metric fuck-ton of images and video that demands to be placed somewhere.

So, the part you have all been waiting for; the hilarity that ensued from FWA. I don’t’ even know where to start. Next time, I promise to have a journal right there with me. 1st off, I had gotten my tongue pierced the Monday that same week of the con: I’m going to be in a show in the next 2 weeks where having a hole in my tongue will be very important. So while I was at the Con, I was having some difficulty talking.. and eating certain foods. I rediscovered my love for Cookie Crisp when I found out I could eat that, and it didn’t hurt my tongue (I love you Cookie Crisp). I was eating with Mata, WolfPac, FilthyRotten, Jackal, and a few others the 1st night, and Jackal and WolfPac decide to be comedic and order buffalo wings. I love buffalo wings, but there was NO way I could eat them.. so I’m glaring at them both.. until WolfPac decided he wants TWO orders.. the bastard… Filthy ordered the same thing I did: a turkey sandwich. Mine got there 1st, and I was like “Mmmm this is sooo good. I can eat my turkey sandwich!” (as best as I could since I was lisping heavily) Her response? “Yeah, well at least I can SAY Turkey Sandwich!” oooh.. harsh… Funny, but sooo harsh. Much of the weekend was spent with people asking me to say words that had “ch” or “th” in them. And for the record, you’re all bastards for that, let me say..

I went trepsing around in my partial a few times, and that was all kinds of fun. There was a fursuit dance competition and OMG was it amazing! Kudos to Duke for doing Usher’s “Yeah”.. the dance routine from the actual video. There were a lot of other really good dancers. It never ceases to impress me when suiters can do the worm or breakdance..or do back handsprings in suit. I’ll have to step up my dancing skills for next year, muwahaha!

I also got to meet some very wicked kewl new furs: Fuego, Greyson, FilthyRotten, Jackal, Teej, Kodie, Archangel, and Recca. There were more.. oh so many more, and believe me I adore every last one of you. Yelling across an expanse of about 2 feet at the top of my lungs “HEEEEEEEY RECCAAAAAAAAA!! HIIII!” amused me for a good 15 minutes or more. Archangel is magic. Paws down. He’s just magic. I got a 45 minute massage, and it was amazing that he could massage a point at the base of my skull, and my tongue didn’t hurt, and I wasn’t lisping! And Kodie.. OMG was that boi hilarious. I ran into the room where they were playing Texas Hold’Em and yell out “Heeey Kodie! Black Power!” and ran out. I don’t think I ever saw soo many confused furs in my life, but it was funny as hell. Mind you, Kodie isn’t black, but he can quote movies typically only seen by predominantly black individuals, and he was the only white guy on his school’s step team. He’s awesome. Very very awesome. There was also some guy that worked in the hotel that I’m going to safely assume he was from the Ivory Coast. He kept giving me Dr Peppers like he was doing me some grand favor.. or he was buying my hand in marriage. I dunno. That is not how we do things in the States and besides, being on staff, I could have just gotten my own drink.. so he was nice, but he was made of fail.

Next up at some point will be my profuse modeling lineup. I’m so excited, I bought new things: ballet heels for a shoot in Jersey, a virtually one of a kind corset.. and other goodies for my personal pleasure

Till Then Stay Tuned!

http://negativ-image.livejournal.com/4739.html

read up my lovelies. This one is pretty serious

Ya know, there was sooo much that went on these past few months that I didn’t have time to write about them in my deadjournal. Aside from that, if I were to backtrack and get all of you up to date on everything, that would take about 3-4 separate entries, and as much as you love me, I know you don’t want to read all of that. Hell, I love me, and I wouldn’t even want to read that much. I’ll give the briefest of recaps and then move on to the most recent event.

The last few months of this past year have seen yours truly busy as all hell. In one month I did 3 shows in 3 different cities, and a photoshoot. Since then, it’s been nonstop action action action with the Xmas holiday at Spencers, and slaving away at the full time job. I was fortunate enough to do 2 shows at one venue in Greensboro, an ample collection in Myrtle Beach, and I performed my 1st fire fan show in Atlanta, which went over AMAZINGLY well. I was very very proud of it personally to say the least. I’ve also recently done a photoshoot with the talented John Dunlap, as well as a more recent shoot with NativeDom of MysticM creations (I won't spoil it, but I'll say two things: 1. June Purgatory is gonna ROCK and 2. just call me "January" ~_^). For the record, I love you guys! I’ve got 4 shoots lined up already for this year, which is very awesome. Another set (or 2) with NativeDom, a shoot with one of SingleCell’s very own Justin Kates, a shoot with old friend Caermon, and a double-set with a long time friend and old favorite: Martin Bialas.

This New Years was perhaps one of the more fun events I had the pleasure of attending: Synthetic New Year, hosted by Single Cell Productions. I did a lot that night; danced on the stage, performed a domming exhibition show, and worked the Dom station upstairs in the VIP area. Yep, I was all over the place that night. ^_^ It was a little tiring, but it was fun and if I could do it all again.. you bet your ass I would! Overall, I would have to say it was a very eventful night, and at the drop of the ball (otherwise known as our very own shiny-clad DJ Krickett in rope suspension) I got to give my super awesome sweetheart Scott (AKA Nexus) a kiss *insert very large smile and blush here* He’s as versatile as I am: working security, being onstage in performances, and now going through Dom training. I even let him practice on me that night on one of the crosses... now that felt relaxing. With allof these shoots, it looks like I’m going to have to sift through my wardrobe to see what I can find. Lol

The next day, I was woken up to Nexus’ cellphone going off, and a voice... on the other end belonging to someone who was downstairs, wanting breakfast. We all went to get bagels, and I rode on the light-rail for the 1st time. It reminded me of riding the tubes in London, so I was kewl with it. The rest of the day was spend hanging out and having fun. Then Nexus, Thor, Fey and I had a nice introspective conversation just before bed. Overall, it was a very good New Years I must say.

I swear, I can help everyone in the universe, but I can’t help myself. Has anyone else ever felt like that, or am I the only one on this? Come to me with an issue about your relationship: friends, boyfriend/girlfriends, fiancé, wife/husband... and I’m all over it. I can give advice left and right, that’s usually pretty dead on. I can analyze behavior and give my opinion on the situation based on what I see, and get an accurate point of view. So why the hell, when it comes to my own life, am I so inept? I mean really. It’s irritating. I would love to just walk up to the guy I have a genuine interest in and just outright tell him. How hard is it to say “Hey, I have a real interest in you, and I wanna pursue it.” It’s harder that you think. I think it’s because I feel that I’m romantically cursed. It hasn’t failed yet. I like a guy.. REALLY like a guy… I tell him I like him.. and BAM; enter Murphy’s Law. Something happens that just messes the whole thing up: they get a girlfriend 2 days later, they move away and lose my contact information.. they hook back up with their ex.. something, anything. You name it, and it keeps me from said liked guy. Even when everything seems to be in my favor, the second I tell a guy, it’s something. Or they turn out to be a little “off”, and I’m stuck in my own personal “Twilight Zone”, and emotionally miserable. The absolute best relationship I’ve had to date lasted 8 months I think. Then Murphy’s Law reared it’s gruesome head and suddenly, I can’t get ahold of him for almost 10 months. By the 9th month I decided “well.. maybe I don’t have a boyfriend anymore…” and the second I decided that.. PHONECALL. And it was him. So we hung out at his place and went to the movies, and he asked me “what would you like for us? What do you see happening between us?” I told him—because I was completely retardedly terrified of losing him completely—that I wanted us to always be friends no matter what, and to always be close. Week later, his sister tells me he’s got a girlfriend. Yeah. Big blow for me at the time. Another guy, I tell him I like him a lot and could possibly date him.. I don’t hear from him for 3 days, and then I hear he somehow found himself with a girlfriend. Greeeeaaat. Ok, so I guess I’m supposed to be that single chic with a house full of animals, that or just NOT tell a guy that I like him a lot and could see myself dating him.

C’est la vie.

I don’t know what spawned this, but I fell into one of those moments where I start thinking too much for my own good. Too much introspection can’t possibly be healthy. So here I am, in the midst of one of my introspective moments, and as per usual, there’s nothing much that can help but listening to brooding music, and writing a poem. I apologize in advance if this is a bad one; I’m not exactly doing much of a check on it, and it’s just fresh out of the swirling mass that is my mind right now.

“There Are No Good FairyTales”

There used be ‘once upon a time’ and lands far away.
Of strange new places, unforgettable faces.
There used to be ‘happily ever after’.
There once were princes, queens, and kings
Courageous knights, who fought for rights
There once were magical, wondrous things—

That doesn’t exist anymore.

There are no good fairytales to tell the world
No stories to unfold, or sights to behold;
There is no ‘happily ever after’.


…ok so I was going to finish this, but my moment of brooding passed thanks to a friend who was sitting near me and stole my Gloom. I’m still introspective, but with less gloom. Besides, it’s hard to write a poem when the emotion fueling it peters out. Ah well. I suppose I can pretty much just sum up my previous gloom then. Ever have one of those days where you feel like you just can’t do anything right? And the people you care about don’t even know that you care about them? At least, from your point of view that’s how it seems? Yeah, that was my moment. Sometimes I swear it feels like I’m somehow cursed. If anyone would like me to elaborate, just ask me in private. Suffice it to say that all of you who are near and dear to me, I care about you guys a lot. Refer to the Dedication entry, so there. And for the newbies, I’m sure you all know who you are; I love you guys too just as much!

I don’t even know how to begin the great awesomeness that was the 2007 AnthroCon! It was FAN-Fucking-Tastic! Lots of new people met, amuck-running, and DANCING!! I think I spent about 90% of my time running around in suit, mostly because it was my 1st Furry convention where I had my completed partial and I wanted to show it off. ^_^ I went trepsing all over the place, skipping down halls, chasing after kitties (sorry guys) and chasing that one guy who was holding the large steak on a fishing pole (damn you Vile Tempter!). There were dealers galore, and I ended up buying one thing the whole time.. but it was a necessity! It was a ball of yarn. So yes. I haz a bawl of yarn! *glee*
We also threw one hellacious party! We started off with margarita mix and some tequila donated to us, then by the end of the night we had to have had about 15 bottles of alcohol, because people kept bringing bottles to contribute! Jax was mixing drinks, I had my iPod plugged into a speaker with kickass sound… and people danced and drank and had a GREAT time! “The Matta Hatta Tea Party” was a total hit! I even held a few domme sessions in the bedroom. I was practicing with my floggers and the next thing I know.. I have an audience, and a line of volunteers to let me practice on them! It was beyond awesome. From what I hear, they were talking about it even after the convention! Kudos to all me new friends who helped to make that night beyond awesome, and MANY Kudos to the Matafleur herself—the mixmaster! And if anyone was wondering where Baby in a Trashcan came from.. it was a mini comic someone at the convention drew that said to spread the word.. it’s about… you guessed it.. a baby in a trashcan.
This is about as recent as I can get now.. as I’m sure everyone could guess when this movie came out. I went to see Transformers with my friend Scott, and OMG.. I LOVE that movie. It was ridiculous; the graphics and CGI were excellent. I just wanted to give a proper shout out to that movie, as it has made its way into my cute lil ol heart. Thanks Scotty for the tour of the uber “scary” Rich-Stepford Wives-esque area. That was fun. J

Well, that’s gonna have to be it for now.. I have a shit-ton to get ready for and not a whole lot of time.. next entry: PURGATORY 33!

Welcome to edition 2 of my little swaray of entries. Let me begin by saying how much I hate stupid people.. and people that think I don’t know how to do my damn job. I was working Spencers and I JUUUST got off from break. I was on the phone with Jax and this guy and his wife are waiting to be rung up, so I clock in and ring them up while on the phone. She looks at me and cops an attitude saying “Excuuse me, but you shouldn’t be on the phone when you’re ringing up a customer.” …bitch, I could technically still be on break. I just look at her and raise an eyebrow, saying nicely that it was an important call; ‘nother manager. Her response “well that’s just rude and if they’re a manager, they’ll understand.” Ok, normally, I would see where she’s coming from.. but we are not having a conversation about her shitty taste in shirts. I’m ringing her loopy ass up, and sending her on her merry way. So I ignore her and by the time she’s done bitching at the air—because I sure as hell wasn’t listening to her—I look at her husband and tell him the price very nicely. He pays for it and I glare at the woman while counting out his change, which was correct.. hey… big surprise there! I can multitask! Now, I could have been a total ass and said to her “Ya know.. I’m on break. You can wait 10 minutes till I get back on the clock” Did I? No. so she can have a coke and a smile, and fuck off. Her husband was nice though; he mouthed an apology for her behavior.
Now, for something shocking… I took part in an event for NASCAR. That’s right.. I said it.. NASCAR. I was a hostess for the Veterans of Foreign War booth. That wasn’t half bad, but it was HOT as HELL outside! I don’t even know how the hell I survived all that walking around in the sun. Not to mention I was parked in the middle of God’s nowhere by the dirt track near the speedway. At the end of the day, we had to give the shirts back.. so I had to walk AAAALL the way to my fuckin car to get a shirt or something that resembled a shirt.. then walk AAAAALL the way back to the speedway to give the lady my shirt.. then AAAAAAALL the goddamn way back to my car to leave.. it got so hot by that third trip I screamed out “FUCK THIS!” and ripped off the light jacket I had, trudging to my car in a pair of red shorts and my black bra. I didn’t care. It was hot. When I got home, I walked right up the stairs, fell on the bed at 6pm, and didn’t wake up until 14 hours later. Yep.. 14 HOURS. I was GONE. I think that was the best sleep ever.

And now… for my glorious penis!
Purgatory XXXII: SciFi fetish. ^_^ My show, I must say, was AWESOME! Thanks to everyone who was in it who made it possible: Slice, FireFlye, Scotty, Jett.. I LOVE you guys! In this show—synopsis time—I played Uhura, Jett was the sexy Captain Kirk, Scotty was the intelligently hot Spock, FireFlye was the alluring Ensign, and Slice, our ever popular Alien with the pink penis. There was sexiness, teasing.. and my penis watersporting on Slice, then taking Kirk from behind. And I got to hear the cheers of “Uhura has a Penis!!” Why yes.. I do.. and it was magnificent. ^_^ TOTALLY fun times and I adored every minute of ot. And thanks to Landon for my Uhura Walk around dress! Pics are on my myspace. If you don’t have the link, drop me a line and I’ll send it to ya!

That’s right, I combined two things that should never be in the same title in any sense of the words. But you know what, It’s me and I can do that! ^_^ So ANYhoos, I’m writing 3 entries back to back, as I have slacked on you, my dear friends and stalkers who always wonder just what this little miscreant does to keep her so busy. Well I’ll tell you. Hope you’ve brought popcorn, there’s going to be a few entries here, separated into entries so it’s not toooo long. You know I hate having you guys read something obscenely long…when it can be chopped into chapters.

Sooo then! Let’s go all the way back to May and Bite Club. That was tons of fun. It was a Wax and Bloody Bitches night, with yours truly doing wax play with a rather hot little thing—Anna, I love you—and a very thick concoction of red koolaid.. mmmm koolaid. The show was amazing. Everyone loved it. But that’s not what is going to make this entry amusing. Earlier that day, I had to run around like a headless chicken in search of a penis for my show for the next Purgatory. That will be explained in more detail in the Purgatory entry. Suffice it to say that I needed an ethnic penis... because it had to match my reddish-brown skin tone. I go to South Carolina, to this large porn mega store and up to the counter where I immediately ask “Excuse me, where are your strap-ons?” nope, I waste no time. He pointed the direction, and then I followed it with the question of the day “..and where are your ethnic penises?” THAT got a raising of the brow from the guy. After confusedly pointing, I smiled and thanked him and skipped off. So I’m looking around for an ethnic penis (I swear I love saying that) and feel a bit dejected and irritated. All of the ethnic penises were either vibrators, or hella expensive and WAAAAY too big to be believable on me. I was on the phone with Jax, one of my best friends, and I’m sure I got a shitload of stares, while I said—quite loudly—“All I want in life is one ethnic penis that doesn’t vibrate, or isn’t ginormous.. is that so much to ask?” I think I had 4 black guys turn and half stare/half grin at me. No fuckers. Not you. The next comment for the day had to be when I was getting frustrated and exclaimed, to Jax “Goddammit. The One day I DON’T want a white dick…” Heh, yeah that got even more stares, which was funny as hell, and I was so flustered-high strung, I didn’t even notice I was being stared at. When I did notice, I just turned and waved at the guys. I’m sure it shocked them.. a LOT. Eventually, I decided to buy a clear one, and have my roommate paint it for me. Thanks Wifey! So in the end, I bought a pink “alien” penis, a strapon harness, and a clear penis for my roomie to paint for me. The things I do to put on a fetish show, I swear. I also bought my very 1st pair of stiletto boots.. those things are nice! I love em! I also wore them for my food fetish show in Myrtle Beach. That was another crowd pleaser, especially when my cute little pets Faye and Anna went giggling out from the back to see how many people would want to lick the whip cream and chocolate syrup off of them ^_^ I love those two, I swear.
Assclown time for a moment! On my way to Centerfolds, I was stopped by this total douche of a state trooper. I was behind him, and the fucker drops his speed, so I signal and change lanes. He gets behind me and then I see it.. lights. Are you kidding me? He pulls me and says “Do you know what the speed limit is through here?” Yeah, it’s 45. I had my car on cruise control… his response “Exactly, 45, which is how fast I was going when you passed me.” Was he SERIOUS?? And after walking around my car he points out my tag was expired and I told him that it was in the mail because I called them about it.. they hadn’t sent it. He was like “Well you should be on top of that” why the fuck do you think I called them jackass.. I mean really, do my tax dollars go to keeping fucktards like THIS on a payroll? He needs to be a special greeter at Walmart, I swear. It didn’t matter to me, because I have Prepaid legal.. so HA!! The case was dismissed. *grin*
So fast forward—and let me say something.. I heard this song called “Beautiful Girls”.. they play it all the time now.. I hate that song. With a passion. They took a perfectly good Ben E. King song.. and prison-raped it in the ass with no lube. Repeatedly. I just had to make that known.
Well, Jax and I get back in town and I have a photoshoot. That was awesome and there are pics on my deviant art. If you wanna see, just shoot me a message and I’ll send you the link ^_^. Anyhoos, I’m near the end of the shoot and all of a sudden, I have the most psychotic craving for Bacon I’ve ever had in my existence. I mean it was insane. I would have shot someone for some bacon. Jax and I go to IHOP after the shoot and all I can say is “bacon.” I know I must’ve looked out of my mind because when the lady asked me what I wanted, I told her I didn’t care, as long as I had 2 servings of bacon. The minute I got it, I told Jax that the building could blow up right at that moment, and I wouldn’t care because I finally had my bacon. I don’t know where the crazing came from, but it had to be satisfied.. and it was so it was all good ^_^

I think that sums up the 1st briefing! Life.. going pretty damned good if I do say so myself.

Yes my friends, it’s that time again, the thing you’ve all wondered if I still remembered how to do or not: RANT! Two things happened recently that I feel I must share with the group, both equally asinine and both making me wonder if there’s some kind of sign on me that says “Hi, I’m incompetent and have NO idea what’s going on”. If there is in fact a sign, someone please tell me where it is so I can use it to beat the hell out of these assclowns.

Last night at Spencers I’m minding my own business. Everything was grand for me, it really was. Close to closing time and I’d be getting gas for my newly fixed car (YAY Orlando) and going to rehearsal. This guy comes in—medium height, ok build, black dood—and walks up to me all huffy. I ask him what’s wrong and he starts going on about how his belt buckle broke. He pulls it out of his pocket and shows it to me, and it is indeed broken. I ask him if he has his receipt, to which he responds “Of course not”…so I tell him that it clearly says on our receipts “30 days with receipt” if he’s wanting to return it. You won’t believe what the hell he then tells me.. He bought the buckle OVER A MONTH AGO! Ok, so we REALLY can’t do anything for him then. I tell him this, and then I hear start about how he’s a stripper, and his buckle broke while he was performing and it was embarrassing because his pants came off before they were supposed to in his routine. ..ok… What does this have to do with me or with him wanting to return it? Honestly. So I give him my famous nod that says “dood, I could give a shit.” And he asks me again what I can do. I tell him nicely that since the buckle was purchased over a month ago and he has no receipt, there is nothing that can be done. She he gets indignant and says he wants to talk to a manager and I better get on a phone or something to call someone. So I turn to him, and with my best “Fuck off Slappy” expression I inform him: “I AM the manager., and that still doesn’t change that you can’t return the buckle.” So he goes to get another buckle, then asks me if I can exchange them. Is he serious? Do I have to fuckin spell it out for him? Is stupidity that damn thick? I Tell him no, he can’t exchange them. And he has the balls to ask me why. WHY? Let’s see here: ya bought the fucking buckle OVER 30 days ago, and you have NO RECEIPT! So THEN I get to hear the story of how he comes in here all the time (like I give a shit) and how he buys buckles all the time from here (Again, Care-meter at zero), and his stage name is Bones so he buys all the skull and bone buckles (Again, I care why?).. and his girlfriend came in here and bought tonguerings (What the FUCK does that have to do with this dipshit’s belt buckle.. or better.. what does that to do with ME??) I told him that’s nice. But still the answer is the same. Did he expect me to say “Oh you’re RIIIGHT! Your girlfriend buys tonguerings from us and you have an underground card? It’s all so Cleaaar to me now! Here, have a new belt buckle!” Let’s play a game called ‘How about.. No.’ Then as if the idiocy couldn’t get any worse, he says he’ll buy the buckle he picked up, paying the difference from the broken one. Is he on Crack?? I mean DAMN.. fucker’s trying to get something for free, and trying hardcore. So he flips his buckle over and shows me where it’s broken.. Yeah, saw that the 1st time, thanks. And he asks me if I can replace just that part…ie: take the loop part out of another buckle and put it in that one. Yeah.. serious crack smoking. So I tell him no, and he’s getting all frustrated and shit, trying to argue with me.. telling me how he’s a welder during the day and he knows that’s not supposed to break. Ok, that’s nice. Go weld your damn belt and stop bothering me! He then asked to speak to someone else, so I told him when Debi was coming in, and told him I’d be working too. He got huffy one last time and left with his fucked up buckle. I mean really.. that whole display was fuckin sad.

Now, on to today:
I’m talking to Jax on the phone and I go to Subway. I already know what I want, I order it all the time. How about this bitch is going to seriously reprimand me for having my phone out? Ok, I understand that a majority of people that they deal with are idiots and can’t talk on a phone and order food at the same time. I can sympathize. But DAMN, do not group me in that same category of incompetent fucks. This chic.. who I can bet my lack-of-soul is younger than me.. gives me this attitude and tells me to turn my phone off while I order.. so I defiantly look her dead in the face and hold my phone up by my shoulder.. cock my head to the side and tell her exactly what I want without missing a beat.. and how about she couldn’t figure it out and had to keep asking me.. so I’d give her the same response.. and with the same attitude she gave me.. the other girls along the assembly line of subs kind of blinked.. because they’ve seen me in here before and they already KNOW the routine. This fake haired twat wanted to cop an attitude with me. I don’t think so. So when she was about to put the wrong cheese on my sub I snapped at her and corrected her.. because I’m sorry, but Provolone sounds nothing like American or Swiss. The 2nd girl looked at me and I rattled off what I wanted, which I could do in my sleep… and had to wait for her to catch up. So I repeat it like 3 times, and the girl at the very end already had the price and I whip out my card and hand it to her, then wait for my sub to be done. I’m sorry, but if you’re going to act like me talking on the phone makes the order take longer.. how about making sure the people making the damn subs are fast enough to keep up with me. How about that. Get out of my ass, and do what you’re supposed to do. There are more than enough circus monkeys in this world, no need to up the population.

This isn’t your average rant; lately I haven’t been in a ranting mood.. maybe noone’s been stupid enough for me to point them out. Heh. Thank the gods for small miracles. No, this time, I think I’d like to take the time to give due acknowledgement to some people who’ve done a lot for me to let them know they’re appreciated. Don’t expect this often bitches! ^_^

Kellie, Jax, Grei, Wolf: My Crew. I’ve known these crazy bastards the longest and they’ve stuck with me through more shite than I can probably remember. They’re my 2nd family definitely. I Love you guys man! Yer totally appreciated for listening to every retarded rant I’ve had and every problem I’ve gone through—either with other people or just my crazy ass. No, I’m not getting mushy, just givin cred where it’s due! And thanks to each one of you for the suggestions on where to hide the bodies ~_^

Lena, CP, Landon, Jess: New additions, but just as loved. Thanks guys for making me smile when I’m down and for listening to me drabble on and on. Thanks for the hugs and the jokes—usually at my expense. Heh. And also thanks for all the times you’ve said you’d kick someone’s ass for me ^_^

Single Cell: My fetish family. I love every one of you and can’t thank you enough for your confidence and support in things I do. And also a special, big thanks to Mandy and Torch, the original deviants of Single Cell, for all the encouragement and reassurance. I swear sometimes I don’t thank you guys enough. And think, now I can put on PVC and heels under any circumstance!

My Furry friends: Love the Furpiles and senseless cuddles, and of course all of the rainbow-colored jokes we’ve ever made. I love the fact that if I decide to toss on wolf ears and a tail.. there’ll be at least 98% of the rest of you who’ll have the same damn idea! And I don’t know what it is with furries and loving the rave music (maybe it’s a standard requirement? Hehe) but I am SO glad I’m not the only one who can rock out a set of glowsticks! Hooooooooowwwwwl!! (translaton: I love you guys)

My RP Buds: Oh no, you’re not out of the clear! I love all of you guys too! You’re the ones who put up with my “Hey, I have this idea for a scene..” which could involve anything from X-Men, vampires and werewolves.. to faeries, crimebosses, and gargoyles. And who can forget my love for the Chronicles of Riddick. Thanks for Final Fantasy spinoffs, epic battles, plot twists, and keeping me awake when I needed it!

And if you don’t find yourself in any of these categories, don’t frown. To anyone who’s ever made me smile, joked.. or took the time to give me a cookie (I like cookies), then you know you’re loved and highly appreciated too!

And if you never gave me a cookie.. well.. I like cake too ^_^

Well this past weekend wasn't bad overall I suppose. I picked up Jax on Thursday. Saturday we went to Purgatory, which was a lot of fun. Kudos to everyone who made it a worthwhile event yet again ^_^ If I were in the right frame of mind to go into detail about it, I would. But suffice it to say that everything rocked at Purgatory. Sunday--cuz I had to pick up Lena from the mall at 7:30, Jax and I saw GrindHouse. Thank god for free movie passes to any consolidated theatres. Sunday we went to Scorpios, which was also a lot of fun. There was one girl there, Luscious.. OMG. she did a cartwheel into 2 back handsprings and landed in a split! And in heeled boots! I was impressed, needless to say. Monday was work at Spencers, yay. Nothing much of interest there. Depending on if I get enough cash for gas I'll be taking Jax home today. As of right now, I'm pretty much moneyless. Literally. Oh the joys of being broke. heh.

On a more thought provoking note.. have you ever had one of those days you wish everything around you would just stop for a while? Or at least pause? I wish I had a pause button.. Rewind would be more useful I think. And a Delete button. Maybe I should just make a remote for Life.

I've been feeling kinda down all day, and a little helpless. I think that's the word I'm looking for. I know I'm not depressed, but I'm not my usual happy self. At least I have things to keep my mind occupied. I'm working through the craptastic aspects of my life that are trying to keep me from smiling, and I'm smiling for the people who give a damn enough to see if I'm ok; you guys know who you are, and I love you.

On a lighter note, I just might be in a few movies if everything goes well. I'll keep you updated on that as it develops. no sense in jumping the gun.